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Sunday, October 5, 2014

Genuine

In the year 200 BC there was an honor code in which to practice yoga. To compare, I would think it to be like The 10 Commandments. They were called Yamas (moral restraints) and Niyamas (moral observances). The hope is that when one practices yoga today, we try to do the same; Become a better person, to overcome selfish ways. A recent quote I found as of late, "Yoga is the martial art of the soul, and the opponent is the hardest one youʻve ever faced: your ego."

Iʻm sure with the crazy schedule of having twins, one would suspect there wouldnʻt be much time to do much else except babies. In most cases, this is true. Iʻm pretty-well glued to my house. However, my mind is not stationary, and many of the times it is trying to work over my own insecurities and impatience (since with two babies crying at the same time, you find pretty frequently).

I would like to talk about one of these Yamas since it has been on my mind and since Chancey and Vanessa are taking longer naps, I get to practice yoga daily. A HUGE relief as well a responsibility. "Satya - truthfulness, non-lying to self and others." A quote from my yoga certification information binder. What does this "moral restraint" actually mean when speaking to others or trying to understand oneself?

When I was going through my yoga certification I would call these times ceilings. I couldnʻt quite get past a certain problem, and wouldnʻt you know, by the end of the weekend of practicing, the ceiling would open and I could adjust my attitude or change my perspective; I would understand where I was wrong. Or in other words, overcome my ego.

Maybe this is the start of the light or enlightenment with satya. You have to know you are wrong, or in other words, humble yourself to the answer. One of my favorite books the author mentions, are you trying to find the right answer, or are you trying to be right? When desperation overtakes, you donʻt care any longer if you are right, you just want to know whatʻs right. Is desperation, honesty? Or do you crave it? Do you seek honesty? Non-lying?

A friend of mine, after a very hard separation and divorce, is now starting to date. Whatʻs her #1 criteria? "I just donʻt want him to lie to me." That is a fantastic hope! If the saying is true though, "you are who you attract,"she has to be living an honest lifestyle herself. Is she going against her own principle? When speaking to these men, are her words direct and does she say what she really means?

I find myself sometimes skirting around issues when addressing my husband. "Wow, Iʻm getting cold." What I really mean to say is, "Matt, Iʻm cold, will you turn the air conditioner up please?" Being direct in what you want doesnʻt necessarily mean you are heartless to the other person in which you are speaking. It means, you are being honest with yourself, and in turn, they can trust that you will continue to be that way. This is another way satya portrays itself. On the opposing side, when you are rude to someone and speak illy of them, you are actually being dishonest as well. You are not a heartless person, so you are going against who you really mean to be: a kind and forgiving individual. (Unless you are a heartless guttersnipe, and in that case, please keep your distance.)

Another example: Saying no when you really want to say no. This one is a hard one for many people, I venture to say more times with women then men. We have a hard time knowing our limits and being true to our boundaries. My neighbor is a good example of this very issue. She and her husband have been so kind as to watch our children from time to time. I can appreciate her telling me upfront when she cannot and when her schedule permits her to help. There are times when I have called and she has told me no, and then responds quickly, "But think of me again in the future!" I respect that she lives a purposeful life filled with things to do. She is also serviceable but will not be taken advantage of when asked. Itʻs time to turn our thoughts from "I donʻt want to hurt them" to "I want to be truthful to myself and to others. They will respect me in the future, and I will honor their friendship more."




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